I was trying to muster up a word to put as my header and all I could think was “existing.” Last week I had made arrangements with the Bargain Shoppe to paint their store front windows for “Back to School.” I had set up a time with one of the main ladies and set my alarm on my day off. So when it went off, I got up … very very sleepy I might add, showered and got dressed.
I was about to leave my hut when I saw I had a voicemail. It was the lady cancelling for today. Half relieved, half annoyed, I ate breakfast and decided today would be an excellent day to get my hair cut a lot shorter.
Thirty miles and ten bucks later, I am nearly sporting a pixie. And I love it wayyyy more than I did on the day I chopped off 7 inches last month. I bought four pieces of large poster board and decided I’d draw on those, for the window display. This way, my thinking is, they can reuse them year after year, as long as they do not fade from the prairie heat.
I motored back home to take a much needed nap then I went to work out at the Wellness Center.
I am not really feeling a lot of restriction with my newly filled band either. And I am worried about that. My surgeon’s office did say I could call and possibly come earlier than September 19th for another fill but I do not want to be THAT patient that is overly anxious. I read on another lap bandster’s blog the other day that this person just got 9cc’s put in and he said the weight just started dropping off. That just hasn’t been the case for me yet.
I keep getting bombarded with the question of “How much have you lost already?” And it’s difficult to answer. Not much to be honest. But I have lost a lot of inches. But I don’t think anyone has even noticed. They just want me to drop an excess amount of weight. Right. Now. And it doesn’t work that way. I wish people would just understand this.
But I’ve gained more confidence in the past 7 weeks. A lot of my diabetic madness has disappeared and overall I just feel great. But I’m feeling like a failure because of the expectations that others have of me.
Last week the shorts I was sporting today were a little tight. Today, they were very loose. Small victories are very BIG to me.